Progressive Wednesday

The TGIF Movie Review: The Matador

Before I really begin this review, a big, big, oh-so-big slab of thanks to the woman working at Blockbuster who, while helping me find this flick, told me to look under “M” for “Matador” and not “T” for “The.” What ever would I have done without her?

So, now, the review. The Matador is easily one of the funniest flicks to come out of 2005; there were moments where it was hard to catch my breath I was laughing so hard. This film stars Pierce Brosnan as Julian Noble, an assassin-for-hire, who runs into Danny Wright, played by Greg Kinnear, a down-on-his-luck salesman. By random chance, they bumped into one another in a Mexican hotel bar, and they subsequently begin an odd, but useful, friendship. Julian takes Danny to a bullfight, shows him how to kill a man, helps him through a bind, and then, six months later, shows up at Danny’s doorstep in need of a big favor. Danny, reluctant but indebted, obliges.

While The Matador is definitely a dark comedy, there’s an underlying tension: righteousness versus ruthlessness. The two, the film seems to argue, are closer than we care to imagine, blurring together when we think they’re separate. Danny’s a businessman and Julian sees himself as the same, creating another theme: Machiavellianism as a way to make gains.

But while the story is fresh and fun with its serious undertones, it’s Kinnear’s pitch-perfect squirming, and Brosnan’s killer delivery of hilarious dialog that make this an absolute must-see. So, here’s just a sampling of some of Brosnan’s lines (these ain’t safe for the kiddies):

• “I’m as serious as an erection problem.”
• “I look like a Bangkok hooker on a Sunday morning, after the navy’s left town.”
• “I need a break. There’s no retirement home for assassins is there? Archery at four. Riflery at five.”
• “An assassin without confidence is a horrible thing to behold. It’s like a relief pitcher who fumbles the ball.”
• “My handler, Mr. Randy, contacted me the way he always does, through an ad in the International Tribune looking for cat sitters in Bali.”
• “I didn’t mean to weird you out. I was wrong, please. I just get paranoid sometimes. I’m drunk. I’m tired, and I’ve just been fornicating for the past two hours.”

Check it out… it’s under two hours: